Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Addie's Death Wish Day

I emerged from the shower today to find Addie and Chloe sitting in a pile of medication pulled from a high shelf in the linen closet. Addie was happily crunching on a children's Pepto tablet. I immediately pulled the "candy" away and asked Chloe what happened. She said Addie did it, and seemed to be telling the truth. Basically, Addie opened the linen closet, scaled a couple shelves, emptied the turntables of medication, opened a child proof bottle, and consumed half of it, by my calculations. Good news is, after talking to the advice nurse and poison control, children's Pepto is essentially Tums, and she'll be just fine.

During lunch, Addie decided to piece by piece, flick her ketchup covered leftovers to the floor. Then she mashed her grapes flat with her plate. These are not dangerous activities in and of themselves, but are pretty risky behavior in front of a mom fresh off the phone with poison control who has a destroyed linen closet. I took her in her room to get her dressed and noticed that her diaper was dangerously askew. I spent the next few minutes chasing her around, trying to pin her down so I could change her. Before I could get her, I heard the squirt of juicy poop and cringed. As the poop soaked through her pants, I hustled her into the bathroom. I got the diaper off and was attempting to clean up the mess when she rumbled again and coated the stool, my bathroom vanity, the wall and the floor with more excrement. At this point, I just threw her in the shower. As I choked back tears of frustration, I cleaned up the mess. Addie kept calling out, "Poop! Shower!" Fortunately it was the kind of poop that just ran down the drain, so I let it. What else could I do? I at least felt grateful that I'd had the foresight to get her to the bathroom before I attempted the project.

I was relieved when that hour of my life was over. Things improved after that, but Addie still seemed to have it in for herself. We went to the tile store to order the tile for the shower surround, and after we left, Addie was upset about her hands being dirty. I didn't look too closely until we got to our next location, when I saw that they seemed to be covered with something sticky. It all came together when I remembered that one of the employees at the tile store had been gluing some new displays together, and I had seen Addie playing with some tiles right before we left the store. Sorry, Style's 'N' Tile, for wrecking your new display. At least she did it quietly.

Speaking of quietly, yesterday Addie mastered the art of quietly moving the stool through the kitchen. Usually she grabs it and pushes it for all she's worth, making a noise like a freight train, and inevitably getting caught before she completes what ever mission of mischief she's on. It was pretty obvious that she'd figured that whole pattern out because though I could still hear the stool moving, she was really trying hard not to get caught. I went into the kitchen to find her rhythmically pressing the water dispenser button on the fridge. I guess we'll have to start using the lock feature again.

But back to today. We then ran a few more errands where Addie continually tried to stand up while in the stroller, but thankfully didn't make it out. Apparently a good head crack was in the works, though, because at our last stop, she fell off the stool in the bathroom and landed hard on her back. Poor thing. She did wake up from the nap she took after that, so I think we're clear on the concussion front.

We have a couple more activities planned for tonight, and I hope she survives. It just doesn't seem to be her day. Or mine, for that matter.


Wilkins Clan said...

I do not know how you are keeping up being so pregnant. I am so sorry. How are you feeling?

Lindsay said...

Oh Ruth--I feel for you...and it seems like keeping up with kids is 10x's worse when you are pregnant.
But I did have to chuckle a little while reading all of Addie's adventures. I'm telling you--I should send Emerson down to visit you guys. I'm sure him and Addie would be the perfect little duo of temper tantrums, destruction and fieriness.
Matt and I throw up our hands in exasperation more than we'd like to count each day. Seriously, he knows how to push our buttons.
Hopefully your next little one will be your calm, little sanity saver :)

Sandy said...

On days like this, there is NO SHAME in plunking the kid down in front of the TV for a few hours. It's safer for everyone that way:)

I've had to call poison control a couple times - once I found KJ sucking on a couple of those round red ibuprofens, and another time J was eating powdered laundry detergent. They both made it through with just a little upset stomach...and a Mom with a bit of a damaged ego:)

Tanja said...

I've had a few encounters with poison control as well. Luckily, nothing serious. Although I well remember the panic I felt while not knowing how bad it might be. I also remember the day my brand new Costco size laundry soap jug got knocked to the floor and flooded the entire laundry room. I was 8 months pregnant with Cameron. I realized as soon as I saw the mess that I was about to have my first nervous breakdown of sorts....I laugh now at it....but oh, if it hadn't been for my mother in law magically showing up at my house I may not have recovered from that day. Good Luck to you my friend!! You're a tough lady...If in a bind get out the big guns....call for help! Hugs!!

Missy said...

Oh my goodness, Ruthie!! What on earth?? It is NEVER a good day when you have to call poison control, but she really just doesn't stop at all, does she? I'm glad you both survived. I hope she's given you a break since then. Love you.